"It used to be “I vant to drink your blood” and now it’s “I vant you to purchase the new single from Death Cab For Cutie, it’s great, haha!” SHUT UP! Listen, I get it, the vampire’s a metaphor for teenage lust, and sucking blood is like fucking, and the fangs are like, a dick or something I don’t know. But aren’t we sending the wrong message to kids? All teenage boys are hormone-filled jackasses; just because this moron can run up a tree doesn’t make him any different. “Oh, but the vampire’s so cute and he totally gets me.” NO SHIT HE FUCKING GETS YOU, HE’S 90 YEARS OLD. HE’S BEEN A JUNIOR IN HIGHSCHOOL SINCE WORLD WAR 2. I think at this point, he’s got highschool chicks pretty well figured out."